What the internet sells

I wish jeans would return to the high-waisted look of my childhood. In the meantime here are some useful stickers which many people could employ:
Des stickers pour cacher la raie de vos fesses

This is Spinal Tape -- perhaps it could be put to the same use. (That site also sells synthetic owl puke, which is a bit of a cop-out compared with combing forests looking for real owl pellets like my brother and I did when we were small -- we had our own little natural history museum -- but on the other hand Mum wouldn't let us touch them if they were growing mould, and they usually were, so this way might be less disappointing. I wonder what happened to our museum? It had some good skulls in it.)

I'd quite like a Salvador Dali moustaches watch, because it gives me joy, but would the joy wear off? Consumerism isn't as straightforward as you'd think.

When small nephew is a bit older I think I might get him some Mad Scientist Alphabet Blocks. They look beautifully made. For myself, I would like a spy coin. Or better still lots of spy coins! I would release them into the wild and no one would notice they had a spy coin until it was rejected by the UL photocopying card charger, and then they'd look carefully and unscrew it, and inside I would put a small note saying "Hello!" Or something better, like a piece of microfilm, or a mini SD card, probably containing an advert for cheap Ciali$.

Edit: I also want a wooden hard drive.